Porn addiction: The ultimate guide to quitting porn in 25 powerful steps.

Posted By Tim Simon 13 Apr 2016

 

Quit porn addiction for good with the ultimate guide and your life will never be the same again.

We carried out a groundbreaking survey of 2000 men who beat their porn addiction to find out what techniques and strategies really worked. We have detailed the answers below in the ultimate guide and now brand new infographic to quitting porn. Both the guide and infographic are packed full of solutions that have been tried and tested by men addicted to porn.

And guess what? They aren’t addicted to porn any more.

The surrey found that more than 75% of men who adopt a plan will reduce or break their addiction to porn. The research was undertaken by Stop Procrastinating, the leading research and productivity website.

Check out our instructive infographic below. It can really help you to combat your use of porn – it’s backed by evidence and science.

 

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Please check out the full guide to beating porn addiction below. We have taken each of the 25 strategies and provided clear practical actions to take in detail:

 

1. Believing you can break the habit is half the battle Porn Blocker

 

Belief is a powerful driver of change. Repeat studies have shown that people have more success replacing addictions and entrenched bad habits than those who don’t believe they can change. Wanting to give up porn is key to being successful.

Believing you can give up, allows you the space to plan how to give up, as you can focus your attention, energy and motivation away from the addiction itself to efforts to break and combat the addiction.

Change is possible. Humans are designed to adapt to change.

You just have to look around you and see what belief has achieved. So now that you have the belief, what are you waiting for?

 

2. Porn can damage your life. Don’t ignore the factsHow to block websites

Watching porn damages your relationships and health and reduces your brain power. The evidence is compelling. Study after study shows the same conclusions

Watching porn makes you an unhappier, less active and attractive and less effective person.

Researchers from the Max Planck Institute in Berlin found the part of the brain controlling motivation and reward, shrinks and works less efficiently in people who use porn. The study found that people who watched more than four hours a week were found to be less able to make decisions, less able to enjoy sex and were likely to be less motivated in their lives generally.

The rise of internet porn is also making men more sexist, viewing women as objects and failing to understand that the whole woman is so much more interesting and wonderful than the make-believe and disturbing reality in porn. If you want to find out more about the devastating impact of sexism on women visit this informative and eye-opening website: Every Day Sexism.

Porn:
• Damages normal relationships
• Destroys normal pleasurable sexual experience with a partner
• Creates negative sexual tastes and behaviors
• Creates destructive sexist attitudes towards women
• Causes depression and anxiety
• Causes erectile dysfunction in more than 50% of men
• Causes loss of memory and concentration
• An inability to enjoy normal everyday pleasures
• Can make you lose friends, perform poorly at work and at study

 

3. The Benefits of Giving Up Porn Giving up porn

Giving up porn will revolutionise your life. There’s no doubt about it.

Understanding this, exactly how your life will be better and more productive without porn is key to giving up.

Porn was ruining my life. I didn’t see friends. My girlfriend dumped me. My grades dropped. I felt anxious. I watched porn for hours each day. But once I decided to give it up, I followed through and now I’m free. I’ve never felt happier, more focused, good about myself!

J Davies. Former porn user.

 

Without porn you’ll start to feel good about yourself and achieve so much more.

• You’ll have more energy and focus.
• You’ll be able to start an amazing, meaningful relationship.
• You’ll start feeling great about yourself and people will take notice!
• You’ll have the time to do interesting things and make interesting new friends
• Your confidence and self esteem will improve.
• You’ll have healthily sexual interests and you can wave goodbye to sexual dysfunction.

 

4. Write Down Your Goals And Create A Plan Of Actionovercoming porn

Robust and powerful evidence shows that writing down your aims and goals, with clear steps for how to achieve them, gives your brain a framework and focus.

This is one of the most powerful actions you can take.

A Harvard MBA study of graduates found those who wrote down their goals and a plan of action were twice as successful than those who didn’t write down any goals.

The sense of achievement when you tick off each action point will increase your motivation and keep you on track.

Don’t be vague and be specific. Don’t write: I will give up porn. But say exactly what you will do: I will block my internet access for three hours today. I will go for a run. I will spend 30 minutes contacting friends to meet up so I am out of the house when I would normally view porn.

Just by writing a list you’ll begin to feel in control.

 

5. Rebooting Your Brain Changes The Way You ThinkRebooting porn

Rebooting your system is a theory based on the idea that watching porn changes the chemical structure of the brain and makes viewers addicted. Forcing yourself to stop watching it allows the brain to reset and will help free yourself from its addictive power.

What’s the science behind this?

Neuroscientists have now found that the brain is not hardwired from birth, but “neuroplastic”. As Norman Doidge, psychiatrist and author of The Brain That Changes Itself says: “not only can it change, but that it works by changing its structure in response to repeated mental experience”.

This change is most apparent in the reward centre of the brain, where a ‘feel-good’ hormone called dopamine is released every time we achieve something. Watching porn results in an excessive release of dopamine, which damages the neural pathways, establishing a compulsive behaviour pattern.

The impact of porn addiction is similar to the effects that other drug and behavioral addictions have on the brain.

A recent study at Cambridge University found that pornography users are fuelled by a need rather than because they get pleasure from it. Read more about it at the Your Brain on Porn website.

The SubReddit NoFap, an online support group and resource, and the Your Brain on Porn website recommend a period of abstinence which helps reset the reward centre in the brain. NoFap recommends a 90-day break from porn and masturbating. A thrill from being disciplined replaces the thrill of porngraphic images.

You could also try the Sexual Reboot program. It comes highly recommended. It is an online course that helps men beat their porn addiction. You are supported throughout and it has good rates of success. Click Here!

 

You’d try out a girl and get a perfect image of what you’ve watched on the internet … you’d want her to be exactly like the one you saw on the internet … it’s ruined the whole sense of love. It hurts me because I find now it’s so hard for me to actually find a connection to a girl.

 

 

6. Block Access To Porn At Source block porn

It is essential that you block your access to online porn. Don’t rely on your will power. You need to create the space to break the habit. Block it now!

High-speed internet has created a generation of men with access to highly addictive porn.

It this immediate accessibility to a limitedness supply of pornography that is the root of the problem. Deny yourself this access and you will give yourself the space and time to

re-establish healthy behaviors and habits in your life.

So put this at the top of your plan. And start doing it today without delay.

Not sure how to do? Below we reveal the most effective solutions to blocking access to porn. They’re the best and they will work.

 

7. Download A Website blocker burning porn

You don’t have to set fire to your laptop, although the feeling might be tempting. There are two types of effective porn blocker or filter and they provide different benefits.

The first is a full out parental control software that permanently filters out porn websites. It requires you to input a password to set up a network-wide ban and so you can’t override it. A highly recommended software to block porn is: Net Nanny. It is a full out parental control software that permanently filters out porn websites. It requires you to input a password to set up a network-wide ban and so you can’t override it. You have to pay for it, but then how much is your porn addiction costing you? You pay for what you get as well. This is the number 1 recommended porn blocker, award-winning and its range of features are simply unbeatable. It comes with a free trial as well, so what are you waiting for? If you are serious about giving up porn this could be the most important action you take today. Click here to download it today.

The second option is a temporary blocker that you can turn on at the times you usually seek out porn. They come with a range of features. You won’t need a password with Stop Procrastinating. It will lock you out so you can’t get back online until the time is up for a period of up to 24 hours. You can either block the entire internet connection or filter out porn websites.

Internet blockers like this help you overcome the need for a password, but also allow you to build up your self-control and discipline, an idea which many psychologists support.

 

8. Be A Computer Whizz And Create Your Own Blockblock porn on computer

Instead of installing software on your computer, you can block websites yourself by going into the backend of your computer system.

Sounds technical? Here’s some easy to follow step-by-step instructions:

Mac

Search for and open the Terminal
• Type  sudo nano /etc/hosts
• Input your password
• Then add the website you want to block by typing: 127.0.0.1   twitter.com
• Enter all your porn websites in this way
• Save by pressing ctrl+o and return
• Finally, enter the following to empty your cache: sudo dscacheutil -flushcache

Windows
• Open Notepad and click File –> Open
• Open up the following file:  C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM32\DRIVERS\ETC\HOSTS
• To stop access to porn websites, type in the following: 127.0.0.1 twitter.com  www.twitter.com
• Keep going until you’ve entered all the websites you need to block
• Save the file and close.

 

9. Block Porn On Your Tablet And Smartphone porn addiction

There are number of apps that block the internet on the iPhone or iPad. The most effective solution is to remove browsers from the device altogether.

You can do this by on the Iphone by going into settings, clicking on general, scrowling down to restrictions, click on enable restrictions, which allows you to set a passcode. You can then block Safari and set an age limit for apps so you can’t download other web browsers from the app store.

Make sure you have backed up your IPhone and IPad before you do this. And remember you need to forget the four digit passcode immediatley. Or get someone else to write it for you.

On Android smartphones, you can use an app called TitaniumBackup which allows you to freeze browsers. You can also automate your phone with Tasker or Automate. With all of these options, you will be able to set a time when the Wi-Fi and mobile data settings will automatically turn off. You can also set up location specific blocks.

 

10. Clean Up Your Digital Life Before Some Else Does porn parents

This could get embarrassing.

Not only are you likely to risk important relationships, but a stash of porn on a computer will tempt you and undermine your efforts to beat porn.

Clean up your computer and detox your digital life of porn immediately.

Delete any images or films you have from every device. Reset factory settings. Delete all porn accounts and emails. And use an ad blocker to prevent pop ups.

 

11. Visualisation – And It’s Backed By Science Porn Blocker

Most visualisation techniques have little evidence to support them, except one.

The scientific name for it is Mental Contrasting with Implementation Intentions and is the result of 20 years of scientific research by New York University psychologist Garbiele Oettingen and her colleague Heather Kappes.

How does it work?

Well you don’t imagine the way you want the future to be, as most pop psychologists will suggest. That will make it harder to achieve. Think of yourself viewing less porn and you’ll watch more porn.

In order to replace a bad habit with a good habit you have to methodically combine negative and positive thoughts or, as Oettingen named it, WOOP for Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan.

The four stages are:

• Think about what you want to achieve for five minutes – a porn free life, for instance.
• Then vividly imagine the best thing you associate with having achieved that outcome (an emotion, more time, feeling happier, more in control).
• Ask yourself what internal obtacles are most likely to prevent you from achieving this – this is about the internal rather than external issues you have. Why can’t you stop watching porn?
• Then create an ‘if-then’ plan in order to take action if that obstacle arises. “If I find myself wanting to watch porn, I’ll remember how it makes me feel and leave the room, or use an internet blocker immediately”.

This technique works by showing you what you want, but helps motivate you to achieve it by ensuring you create a plan to deal with any obstacles. You can’t achieve your aim just by dreaming about it.

Check out the official website here: WOOP My Life.

 

12. Mindfulness Meditationporn counselling

 

Mindfulness meditation is another technique with a strong body of evidence and research to back up its effectiveness.

In fact many ex-porn users say it played a significant role in their battle to kick the habit. More than 100 studies have shown that the area of the brain that regulates emotions is larger in people who meditate.

Meditation increases dopamine levels by 65%, which helps combat the chronically low dopamine levels from which addicts suffer.

Mindfulness is also effective at preventing relapses with 47% of people using this technique not replasing back into negative behaviour pattens.

Mindfulness focuses on being in the now, an awareness of your thoughts, feelings and sensations.

Mark Williams, professor of clinical psychology at the Oxford Mindfulness Centre, part of Oxford University’s department of psychiatry, calls it a “direct knowing of what is going on inside and outside ourselves, moment by moment”.

How to do it:

Set aside at least 15 minutes to sit quietly, breathe deeply, paying attention to your body, observing how you feel. It is non-judgemental, but allows you to observe yourself.

The discipline is to empty your mind and be aware, almost to foreground what you are doing. It separates your mind from your body and allows you to have insight into the way you are behaving and your porn use.

You can get more information about Mindfulness at Building the New and Be Mindful.

Take time out:

Remember to add these powerful techniques to you plan and action list. They will work well combined with an internet blocker.

 

13. Understanding Your Triggers what triggers porn

Think about what happens before you start viewing porn. Are you having difficulty concentrating, are you bored, alone, had an argument, or are you feeling down? Is being in a particular room more likely to result in your viewing porn?

Think through these triggers and try to remove them from your life. This will be easier once you have blocked porn from your computer. Try to replace the triggers with an activity that blocks the urge.

We’ll cover the list below in more detail, but here’s a few options to start you off. There’s a lot more interesting activities out there then looking at porn alone on your computer!

Replace the urge with an activity that blocks the urge:
• Listen to comedy.
• Use social media
• Arrange to meet a friend
• Play a computer game.
• Plan to meet a girl.
• Listen to music.

 

14. Join A Forum And Get An Accountability Partner porn support forum

Giving up porn is turning into a movement as hundreds of thousands of young men break free of it each year. There is strength in numbers.

Many ex-porn users say they relied on the support of others to help them quit. Using an online support group put them in touch with many other people suffering from the same issues. The anonymity of an online forum enabled them to engage with others without the fear of being exposed or judged.

The SubReddit PornFree is a great place to start for advice and support. You can also try Porn Addiction and Daily Strength. Another online group is Slaa Online.

Another powerful solution is to work with an accountability partner so your online activity is public to some you trust or someone in a similar situation who you can call on for non-judgemental advice and support. Software such as X3 Watch can hook up with an accountability partner. Each week they’ll get an email report of the sites you’ve visited.

Covenant Eyes is similar software but it has a religious focus which some ex-porn users found helpful.

 

15. Group Therapy And Cognitive Behavourial Therapyporn therapy

Being supported and challenged by people overcoming the same problems is one of the key reasons why group therapy is effective. By getting out from behind your computer screen and discussing your addiction with real people makes the difference for some porn users. Group therapy will also help you back into experiencing normal social activites.

It is the nature of the group, the ideal that you are sharing and aren’t alone, that can have a powerful impact.

You can search for local groups at Smart Recovery and the Pathways Institute.

CBT or Cognitive Behavourial Therapy is one of the most well researched and documented approaches for dealing with depression and anxiety. New evidence has found that it is also effective with addictions.

It works by changing the way your think and behave. It helps you break down your problem into manageable parts. It habitually introduces you to new behaviors over time and gives you the resources to deal with negative behaviours in your life.

Find a therapist at the National Association of Cognitive Behavioral Therapists or online tools such as Online Therapy. It will give you structured support and make you accountable for your progress.

16. Withdrawal Symptoms. Don’t Give Up! porn cold turkey

Giving up porn isn’t going to be straightforward. Many men report withdrawal symptoms and that may tempt you to restart your addiction.

Don’t. They won’t last and many men have got through them. If they can, so can you.

Withdrawal symptoms may also be a sign that you aren’t filling your time with alternative activities. Giving up porn isn’t just about stopping viewing online pornography. If you’re to be successful, you need to take a whole life approach and work out and fill in what’s missing in your life.

 

17. Filling Your Time With Purpose. beating porn

 

If you’re addicted to porn you might be feeling lethargic and uninterested in other activities. You need to get out of that mindset. Use the visualisation techniques discussed earlier to think through what you want to do with your life. And if you’re stuck, download these free life coaching tools which will help you fill your life with meaningful activities. Mind Tools and the Coaching Tools Company.

You should also check out the a href=”http://sacredsexualityproject.com”rel=”nofollow” >Sacred Sexuality Project set up by Mark Queppet, a former NoFapper, who is now a life coach. He provides advice and support through videos and coaching. Mark believes that many therapist don’t understand the impact of high speed internet porn on users’ brains.

Today people use porn as a mood modifier. If you are feeling bored, anxious, lonely, angry, sad or have any other negative emotion, you can turn some porn on and instantly escape from that discomfort.

Mark Queppet. Founder of Sacred Sexuality Project.

 

18. Take Up Exercise. You’ll Feel Like A Millionexercise to cure porn

Exercise helps balance dompmine in the brain and keeps your motivated. It goes without staying that exercise makes you feel good, not only by boosting endorphins in your brain, but it helps keep you slim and toned. Who doesn’t feel great when they look great?

When you’re feeling good about yourself you are more likely to want to seek out company and engage in sociable positive activities. Many men who are giving up porn claim that exercise helped them by giving them energy and the confidence to get out from behind the computer screen and engage with people and real women.

It doesn’t have to be painful. If you don’t like running or going to the gym, how about walking, biking, roller blading, learning how to play tennis, or join a local softball or baseball team – there’s an exercise for everyone!

 

19. Dancing Will Make You Give Up Porndancing addiction cure

Seriously? Yes. Before I explain why dancing is the elixir of life, just stop and think about it for a minute. Dancing just makes you feel… and put any word to fill the gap. Happy, energised, enthused with life.

Dancing isn’t limited to clubbing, of course. There’s the opportunity to go out, meet new people and learn a new skill. There’s a dance made to measure for everyone from lindy hop, tango, line and barn dancing, cèilidh, salsa, doing the soul train…

According to research it can help you solve problems, improve your memory, make you happy, and in terms of helping you give up porn, it’s a major motivating factor to get up off your bed, turn off the computer and go doing something amazing with real people that will make you feel great about life.

 

 

20. Learn A New Skill. And Look Cool While Doing It beat porn

And on the theme of learning new skills, rebuilding your life means replacing one bad habit with good habits and activities. This is the opportunity to reach high and learn something new with all the time you have now that you’re aren’t wasting it watching porn. Learn a language or a musical instrument. Try out rock climbing, start a new business, become a motivational speaker. The world is literally your oyster.

I feel like the next Sir Issac Newton or Leonardo da Vinci. since I quit a month ago, I’ve literally: started a business, taken up piano, been studying French every day, been programming, drawing… and have more awesome ideas that I know what to do with…

 

 

21. Join A Meet Up And Find Interesting People meet up

Use Meet Ups to embrace an old or new found passion or pastime. You can join one of the many thousands of Meet Ups around the world on just about any subject or interest.

You could go see old movies with like-minded people, talk about science, life and the universe, join a debating society, a computer programming club, learn how to start your own business, or hang out with people who want to sing, walk, run, paint, write. Meet Up is the world in one place.

Joining in with other people, taking up activities again or for the first time will fill your time with something other than porn. But crucially it will help you to see that your time is better spent this way, hanging out with new real friends than virtual porn stars online.

 

22. Get A Pet. It’s Backed By SciencePet Therapy

The influence of pets or companion animals on our health and wellbeing is immeasurable. Research after research study shows how our animals keep us healthy in mind as well as in body.

Former porn users have said that taking on more responsibility in their lives by owning a pet and transferring their attention to their needs, helped them beat their addiction. It got them exercising, reduced their stress levels and amazingly made them laugh more.

The health benefits of owning a pet are enormous: from improving the health of your heart, to reducing anxiety and depression. In many ways owning a pet could reduce many of the triggers that lead you to view porn, as well as allowing you to care for something else in your life, which in turn will make you a better person.

For more research about the impact of pets on your health visit the Center for Research.

Remember to speak to your vet first before getting a pet to ensure it the right one for you.

 

23. Travel And Volunteer. It’ll Be The Making Of Youtravelling porn

Travelling and volunteering are two proven activities that ex-porn users say have helped them add texture and meaning to their lives. Seeing new places and helping people less fortunate than yourself can give you a different perspective on life. And you never know, you might meet someone wonderful to have a real relationship with.

Filling your time with meaningful real activities is essential to beating porn.

 

24. Start A New Relationship real relationship porn

Porn damages normal relationships, creating unhealthy sexual behaviors, dulling or killing affection for your partner.

Porn users are often lonely. Porn is often the cause of stress in a relationships.

Research shows that porn users are less interested in sex with their partners. A study in the Archives of Sexual Behaviour found that the more men used pornography, the more likely they were to try to act out the same scenes and rely on pornography-inspired fantasies to engage in sex.

French research has linked the compelling nature of porn to your brain’s ‘mirror neuron system’. This skews your expectations of what sex should be like. Porn has a way of normalising extreme sexual behaviour. If you try to play out this fantasy with an unwilling partner, it can cause irreparable damage to your relationship.

It’s important to replace your damaging relationship with porn with one with real meaning.

A real relationship should be caring and loving, with mutual respect and affection. Giving up porn will help you to solve any relationship problems you have or start a new healthy relationship that will beat porn hands down!

 

25. Have A Healthy Sex Life With A Real Personporn healthy sex life

Mutually consensual sex is healthy, fun, loving and a great way to spend your time. It is not porn. The final stage of your journey to kick the porn habit is to replace online stimulation with real sex.

You will start desiring normal healthy sex as part of a relationship as your porn habit becomes a thing of the past. If you need extra advice and help on how to reestablish a healthy sexy life visit: Healthy Sex and Society for the Advancement of Sexual Health

Remember to live your life in the real world and not in the world porn. You’ll be happier, more successful, a better lover and a great person!

 

Porn destroyed every relationship I had. I didn’t want sex or love or kindness. But once I quit I found what I was missing. Caring about someone else. Their thoughts, how they smelt, how they laughed. Just spending time together, being in each other’s company, enjoying life, being a part of someone else… I will never replace what I have now with porn. I’m through it and life is wonderful.

T.Bennett. Free from porn for 5 years

 

Tim Simon is a researcher and writer. He interviewed many ex-porn users in his research for this piece and focused only on what really helped men beat porn.